Author / Shawn McKinney

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Posts by Shawn McKinney

A bike riding code monkey.
by Shawn McKinney

GW300 V

Preamble

Lincoln’s a proper drive from my home base in Little Rock. Broken into 3 legs. First to Rogers where Megan lives. Second to KC where’s there’s Heather and another sister, Kyle on a special guest appearance. Then onto Lincoln. Each segment takes about 3 hours. Overnights in any of each. For sure meal stops.

No family in Lincoln. That’s where my Gravel Family resides. Been coming here every August since 2018. It feels like a second home. All of the necessary attributes. Lots of friends. With its good times, and bad. Triumph and failure. A place to celebrate. A place to battle demons.

Pregame

Shakeout ride was on Thursday around lunchtime. Left from the Sandhills Event Center for a little out-and-back. The first and last 12 & 1/2 miles of the course. Felt pretty good. Hung out at the expo afterwards. Checked in. Visited with some old friends and made some new ones. Like how it was to be a little kid on a bike. Hey do you ride? Me too. Let’s be friends. Simple as that.

Lots of vendors bringing with them new ideas. Get to rub elbows with some pretty amazing people. Hearing their stories. Gathering the encouragement and nerve that would be needed to complete the challenge that awaits.

Later, a nice dinner with Carmen and John, at Lazlo’s in the Haymarket. It has been awesome watching them progress from novices to experts over the past couple of years, since we first met here. Seeing their fitness gains. This year Carmen’s doing the 75. John had to step down to the 50K, but sees it as an opportunity to PR.

Lastly, visited with Kelly and Michelle, back at the event center where they were camping. We had the same conversation about who was the least prepared. You can’t trust Michelle’s assessment. She always says that she didn’t train and crushes it anyway. Same with Kelly, who’s in the Double. A 50K run Friday morning followed by 150 miles on the bike Saturday. Who does that?

Prep

Then the little shifter issue. Called Richard who runs my local bike shop. He told me to call if I get into a problem at race. Like the first Long Voyage (2021) and a bent derailleur. Lost the middle gears. Affected the outcome. Not going there again. Richard got me going. It was stressful and in a weird way, beneficial. Burned off the last of the pre-race jitters with a blow torch of anxiety. Let’s call it a test.

Start

The 17:00 start Friday was delayed. Not quite fifteen minutes. A front had passed over dropping temps by at least 10 degrees. How lucky can we get? Carmen and John were there which helped calm the nerves.

Found Andy at the starting line. He’d been called up for being a possible five time finisher. The only one who has ever been eligible as the race is only five years old and there are only so many crazy people that get past their first or second. This would be our third time teaming up.

And we’re off. Don’t know how many, maybe 50 or 75. Not a lot. Sent under a hail of enthusiasm and positive energy. It felt good. Any remaining anxiety gets burned away. Knew we’d better soak up these good vibes. Gonna need it.

It did rain a bit with some wind. Not much lightning. I stopped once about an hour in to put on a poncho. Couldn’t quite get it over my swollen Camelbak. Screw it. We don’t need no stinking ponchos. Then it stopped. Some blustery wind gusts kicked up for a while. Made things interesting. Added to the excitement of the moment. I harbored some concern over what was gonna happen down the road, if/when the MMR’s get soaked. That’s just one of many and nothing to be done, so forget about it.

The evening grew dark and all’s well. We’re making decent progress. All systems functioning nominally. Time to get dialed in for the long roll through the night. Make the necessary adjustments. Met a couple of unlucky riders in Plattsmouth who had to bail out. One had vertigo, another with a nasty sliced tire. Both seemed OK. Nothing to be done other than kind words.

Big Muddy on a toll bridge requires a quarter to cross. Carmen gave me one at the starting line. This about when it gets fun. As in Type I. Now, we’re going places. Across the wide expanse of the valley into the lush rolling fields of Iowa all under the cover of darkness.

We’d traversed many of these roads a couple years earlier. They were familiar and even comfortable. Like an old friend who can be cantankerous. We knew where the difficulties were and didn’t have to think much about them.

We’ve talked some before about how the early morning hours can get spooky. Strange lights and sounds. Overnight crossings of interchanges is never going to be fun. A couple long stretches on pavement. Makes sense. We’re crossing a major river valley and an Interstate. One of the longest climbs into a small town called Glenwood. There folks passing in cars, slowing and staring at us as if we were aliens. Maybe we had been abducted or infected by them. Then back into the climby bits. Progress was still good, not great. Everything well within tolerances.

Passed thru Treyner’s firestation somewhere in the middle of the night. They opened their doors and let our filthy selves in. Didn’t catch the name of who was pulling cleanup detail and watching the store. Looked to be pretty high up the food chain. Maybe the captain? An unmistakable boost to our morale to have them here. For communities to welcome us. Makes us feel validated and safe. A humbling experience. Jason Strohbehn’s a favored son in these and parts and it shows by how we’re treated.

Moving out of there and back into the grind of the Iowa country side. Up, down, up, down and up and down and up and down. On and on it goes. Never stopping. The climbs are punchy enough to require effort. On the other side you better make damn sure a proper line’s being kept. We mostly bombed the downhills. The climbs and chunk was slowing us down. We weren’t making good time.

As the hours ticked off it all starts to gradually wear you down. The constant stream of effort and focus means both the body and mind are burning energy. Straining eyes scan the foreground for hazards in the most minute of detail. Eyeglasses fog over from being at dew point. Eventually, just stowed them. Do you want proper eye protection or clarity of vision? What’s worse being in the ditch or having something stuck in your eye? The bugs weren’t bad. With just me and Andy, not a lot of rocks getting kicked up.

Do you ever get that song stuck in your head?, Andy asked. Yeah, but not right now. Could’ve been a Stones song. Can’t Get No Satisfaction. Or maybe ACDC Thunderstruck. Music, especially Classic Rock, is a safe topic out here. Nostalgia can drown the pain.

What do you think about? I’d been riding quiet for some time. I’ll tell you what doesn’t get thought about. That we have 200 miles left to ride. What’s happening right this second gets priority. There are countless issues to contemplate. They seem trivial in a normal context but rise in importance when in the moment. Starting with navigation. I already mentioned vision. Related to that is lighting. How it all gets maintained absorbs all of my attention. Turn the light intensity up on the downhills, back down again once at the bottom. To preserve power. If I do it right, there’ll be plenty for tomorrow night. If I make it that far.

On top of hydration? Filthy bottles caked with who knows what, from the roads. How about some food? Oh shit, watch out. F, almost went down there. Let me get my heartrate back down. How much further to the next stop. Is the drivetrain starting to play a tune? There’s strategy and tactics. When can I stop vs. How can I not stop.

The GPS headset displays the map, heartrate and power metrics. Bike computer has speed and average mph. Rarely do I look at distance traveled. Only when trying to plan a stop. Speaking of GPS, it consumes power too. I already switched on the aux battery about an hour after sunset. That keeps the backlight on. Great for navigating. No missed turns or surprises. More than a feature at night.

Again, not really watching time or distance. What difference does it make? It’s not like there’s another gear or power source for legs. They’re doing what they can do. Leave them alone. Let them do their thing.

Just before the nature trail segment we caught up with Brian. He’d been out ahead of us for an hour or two. Could see the blinky lights appear and disappear in rhythm with the hills.

The three of us rode together for the next hour. It was nice being able to relax, chat and just crank the wheels over that smooth, flat and well maintained trail. Gave the mind a much needed rest from the strain of the downhills.

Once we hit the other side, it was time for another stop, in Shenandoah. Jamie Tracy had his van by the Caseys. This was now the third year I’d seen him out there. His wife Christie had passed through hours before. She eventually was the first woman finisher. I had drop bags there. A change of socks, gloves, head gear and lights. Grabbed the powder for the 2nd half, refilled water tanks, and off again. No time to hang out, even though it would have been nice.

Not long after was the sunrise. That’s always going to bring a boost. This one was foggy and overcast. A kind of gloomy mood seemed to settle in. Underscored the task that lay ahead.

Riding through the Windmill farms was routine. We’d been warned numerous times about the heavy chunk. It was anticlimatic. Didn’t even have to slow down. Well, maybe once. Just more prime Grade A chunk. By then we’d grown fat on a steady diet.

Hamburg, MO. A Great Stop. Maybe the best of the day. Super nice little river town. I was happy to be out of Iowa after 100 miles. We clipped the top corner of Missouri. Enough to say we’d been there. Passed another rider before reaching town. More pavement, and now that the sun burned off the cloud cover, it’s starting to look like a beautiful day. The townfolk were nice considering how awful we looked. They in their Saturday finery and us being not so fresh. Friendly chatter and even some cheers. As if we weren’t Bushwackers riding out from the hills after another night raid.

Beginning to show signs of wear, but you got to keep a happy face. Not that have a nice day fake bullshit happy. What else was there to do? No use complaining. We all knew another 125 miles of Shane’s Little Shop of Horrors awaited us to the finish line.

Rolling out of Hamburg meant crossing the US Hiway 2 bridge over the MO river basin. Not a fun crossing. A long stretch of paved shoulder with no safe egress. This means cars and trucks whizzing past with no escape. We have to trust them. That they’re not out of their minds or distracted by phones. Most got over. Some didn’t. One laid on the horn. Obviously confused. How dare we ride there. Wait a minute. This is not an Interstate. Race or no race, we have every right to the shoulder. Find something to like about it.

In any case this is how I roll. Busy interchanges are the only way into / out of most towns, bicycle infra being what it is. More hazards than you can shake a stick at. Not recommended. Do something often enough and it becomes normal. Probably not OK for you. Fine for me.

Next, we’re back on gravel where we rule. Had a long way along the river headed north into the wind. When Andy and I started working together. We’re not exactly breaking speed records, but not losing more ground. When we helped a rider get his wheel plugged. We’re on the bubble and losing time again. So what. Form Over Function. Not even a hard question. Yes, stop and help the rider.

Afterwards, more work headed north and west as we made our way on a meandering path back to Lincoln. Climbing out of the river basin, more hills and a rising tide of wind from the north.

Upon entering the course with the 150 milers there was a checkpoint at the Arbor Day Trail. A winding, chunky little patch through the park that I could have done without. That’s OK. It’s not always about me. Compounding woes we almost missed the water stop. The 150 riders had long since passed. Their timing strip was being taken down. We stopped and talked to the driver who pointed us back to water.

They waited on us. About half a dozen. Angels lent from a town nearby. I can’t remember their names. They didn’t know exactly who we were either. It didn’t matter. Is there ICE? Yes, we have cooler over there. A water hose was produced along with some snacks that I had no need for. The water and ice were enough. Along with the kindness they showed helping us get our act back together.

About when we started to notice the heat. Nothing bad actually. Just enough to know it gets to play its part. Did I mention hills? No matter, just put that on repeat. Then the MMRs kept us sharp. I did not mind them. Enjoy is a better word.

Trucks and volunteers started to pass by. Need anything? I could use a bottle of cold water. Tear open an LMNT package and pour it in. Shake and down it like some kind of weird gravel junky. Get that salt fix. Could have been refreshing? Take that sun. We win for now.

Speaking of the mind, it becomes trouble ignoring its symphony of pain. Which hurts the most rings the chorus. Or, the question everyone asks, how do you sit that long on a bicycle seat? Well, yeah, exactly. There are workarounds. A good fit, saddle, bibs, chamois and cream of course. Don’t make me tell you my Chamois Butt’r allergy story. I’ll tell you. Just keep asking about butt pain and you’re gonna hear about it. I promise that you won’t like it.

A tolerance develops. There are limits. They can be pushed aside with more training. I didn’t train as much as I would have liked. When you punch it all in the answer becomes maybe not what you want.

To think about it is to grant it power. Push it back. Besides, the neck hurts even more? A riding position for 24 hours isn’t real comfy. We don’t have neck pillows that work on gravel bikes.

What about us the legs beg. You’re not cramping, what do you have to complain about. Been doing hack squats for about a day. Quit your whining. The back ain’t exactly celebrating and the hands are screaming bloody murder. Palms getting cut up. Oh well. What about me poor arms. Don’t we get some love? Shut the f up. You got aerobars. What more do you want. The tummy’s notably absent from this sad song. It really wants to help. But, it’s language of love is cheeseburgers and corndogs and they’re not yet being harvested from the fields.

That’s not Andy getting out further ahead. We’re just letting him think so because it’s good for his ego. Him on one gear speeding away from me on 12.

Probably should’ve broke out the ear buds. The symphony of pain was growing louder.

And still we slow. Everything’s dropping. Power, speed, heartrate. Another 20 miles to the next stop. I need food to replenish. Have another bread ball. It’s Wonderful. Why can’t I swallow it? Spit it out. Can I interest you in another gel pack? Naw, just a salt stick for me, thanks.

What the hell, am I complaining? We’re on House Money. What with the summer training and health drought. A month earlier couldn’t even say I’d make the trip let alone line up for the 300. Most likely would’ve dropped down to the 150. Like back in ’22. Decided to go for it. With the second century now behind, it’s all good.

Gratitude can be a salve. Sure, the wind, rocks, legs, neck were under constant review. A perfect backdrop into not finishing with zero regrets. Failing the greater challenge’s better than just another finish. These gains must be appreciated and put into perspective.

That spot up on a hill. So green and lush. It offers trees and shade. Looks so nice and peaceful up there. The wind feels like a gentle autumn breeze. Maybe I could stop for a moment. Might find a cookie if I dig around enough. Could answer some of those texts of encouragement that have been coming in.

Who are you calling? Have you found what we’re looking for? Does it matter if the finish line was crossed? Or are the experience and lessons enough? A finish is good but it’s not why we’re here. There’s more. Got to get a hamburger and think about it.

When the Yukon arrived. Didn’t want to mess it up. Told not to worry about it. They’re ferrying riders from western Iowa / eastern Nebraska and back all day and night. Won’t accept anything extra as payment. 3 feet Cycling. Not the last time our paths will cross.

After

Carmen, John were back at my truck. When I learned about Michelle’s concussion. It’s a long story and not really mine to tell. The short version is she’s OK. John PR’ed the 50K. Carmen didn’t get to finish her 75. She found Michelle unconscious and stayed with her until the ambulance came. Later she made sure her bike made it back to Lincoln. She gave up a finish and helped a friend who needed it. I wouldn’t have expected any less from her. That’s how this Gravel Family rolls.

I did get to hang out with Michelle at the finish line. We had that hamburger and waited for Kelly to cross. A muted celebration. I picked up my four pack of Climbing Kites and headed back to the hotel room.

Day After

Andy finished of course. Eleven minutes before the cutoff. I wasn’t there. He got that award for 1500 miles of hell. He says it’s his last. He’s done with single day events and wants to focus on things like the Great Plains Gravel Ride. We had breakfast with his wife Kristy and I had a nice time hearing how they met on a bike ride. If you want to talk to Andy, you best get on two wheels.

Afterwards it was back to KC for another meetup with sisters, Kyle, in from Seattle, and Heather, who lives in Waldo. Onto Rogers for another night hanging with Megan and Cameron. We topped it all off with an ice cream run.

A more perfect ride could not have been asked for. Was it the outcome I wanted? It’ll do.

by Shawn McKinney

About Getting to the Starting Line

The hard part of an event is getting to the starting line. Can we push those barricades aside, or do they become insurmountable.

I made reference to some of the difficulties in an earlier post. It’s not fun to talk about. Actually, I hate to discuss it. Not only is it boring for the listener, it’s a form of acceptance. Talking about it makes it true.

For sure part of this is just the natural aging process. Our bodies become less resilient. Exactly where that marker lies is highly subjective. For example, someone in their 40’s is probably past their prime but can still achieve personal bests, especially if bloomed late.

The 50’s can be OK. There’s a dropoff, more like a ledge and then a plateau. The key’s stability. Given a certain input we can achieve a predictable output. No surprises. Just keep cranking that wheel.

The 60’s is when things can go haywire. Chronic conditions that were dormant rise to the surface. Old health conditions from an earlier age return. That bad joint. Decades of poor choices in our youth have a way of making themselves known later on.

Again this is all subjective. We each have our own timelines.

The question becomes how much is too much. There are hard stops. That knee replacement probably will end your ultra career. Certain types of chronic conditions can halt intense conditioning, based on severity.

I’ve been teetering for a few years now. Again, no details. Dig around here and you’ll find references, not that I’m recommending it.

What difference does it make? Nobody cares what you’re going through. I mean, we care, but we have our own problems, and can always point to someone who has it worse.

For examples hang around the finish line of any long distance event. The stories will inspire. We’re amazing creatures, capable of much more than we think.

Which brings us to gratitude. This cup is definitely half full. That is I’m still getting to the starting line — somehow.

It’s all about what’s in front of you. Forget the declines and disappointments and focus on the challenge that lie in wait. The knee’s already shot, lets see how many more miles we can get out of it. What do we have to lose? That rocking chair can wait.

by Shawn McKinney

It ain’t easy

2025 was all lined up. On paper it held promise. Coming off a fairly strong year, was feeling pretty good. Got thru the flu in Feb and started ramping up. Plenty of time for Coast2Coast and that was to be the perfect springboard for another Long Voyage (now called Gravel Worlds 300).

Returned from Unbound (as a volunteer) in early June and knew right away something was off. My heart rate was elevated and was having other problems that I’ll not go into here. Fitness was definitely off. Couldn’t sleep, wasn’t eating right, riding was out of the question.

Might be dumb, but I’m not crazy. Or, maybe the other way around? Yes, some of these events are challenging and atypical. But, I have had good success training for them. It’s not in the head. Either you’re ready, or you’re not. You can’t think your way into the starting corral.

You can think your way out of it. But, that’s not what was going on. Well, what the hell is wrong? Are there cardiac issues? Nothing to mess with. Riding’s fun but it’s not worth risking health problems.

It’s the other way around. Health is paramount. Setup the appointments, went to the specialists and as of today, everything checks out good. I started training again in earnest last week and it’s going good also. Just in time for Gravel Worlds. Will I line up for the 300? Perhaps not. There are other distances. I may have to drop down.

We shall see.

by Shawn McKinney

Install Apache Directory Studio From Source on Rasberry Pi

This post includes instructions to download Apache Directory Studio source code and install to a Linux machine. The instructions are tailored for a Raspberry Pi.

It includes an extra step to modify the pom.xml to add Eclipse runtime on Linux desktop for ARM processor.

It’s expected that the next release of Apache Directory Studio will include binaries for Linux ARM and so it won’t be necessary to build from source.

1. Preq it

```
sudo apt-get install git java
```

2. Git it

```
git clone https://github.com/apache/directory-studio.git
```

3. Arm it

```
cd directory-studio
vi pom.xml
# add (around line 167):
<environments>
...
  <environment> 
     <os>linux</os>
     <ws>gtk</ws>
     <arch>aarch64</arch>
  </environment>
...  
</environments>
...

Save and exit

4. Build it

```
mvn -f pom-first.xml clean install
mvn install -DskipTests=true
```

5. Install it

```
cp ./product/target/products/ApacheDirectoryStudio*.tar.gz ~/Tools
cd ~/Tools
tar -zxvf ApacheDirectoryStudio*.tar.gz
```

Where *Tools* is your target for applications.

6. Run it

```
cd ApacheDirectoryStudio
sudo ./ApacheDirectoryStudio
```

7. Script it

Because Apache Directory Studio has to run as root we have to create a bash script to execute.

```
# alter the paths to match your env:
vi ~/Tools/ApacheDirectoryStudio/start.sh
# add:
sudo /home/user/Tools/ApacheDirectoryStudio/ApacheDirectoryStudio
```

Save and exit.

8. Execute it

```
chmod a+x start.sh
```

9. Launch it

```
sudo vi /usr/share/applications/studio.desktop
# Paste info:
    [Desktop Entry]
    Type=Application
    Name=Apache Directory Studio
    Comment=LDAP Browser
    Icon=/home/user/Tools/ApacheDirectoryStudio/configuration/org.eclipse.osgi/78/0/.cp/studio.png
    Exec=/home/user/Tools/ApacheDirectoryStudio/start.sh
    Terminal=false
    Categories=Application;Development;
```

Save and exit. Where “/home/user/Tools” is where you put the binaries. Launcher will be under the “Programming” menu item.

by Shawn McKinney

Install Apache Netbeans From Source on Rasberry Pi

This post includes instructions to download Apache Netbeans source code and install to a Linux machine. The instructions are tailored for a Raspberry Pi.

The advantage of using a Pi is that Apache Netbeans works well in resource constrained environments. This makes it ideal for usage on that device.

Download Sources

We suggest the following location for your download

Do These Steps

1. Prereqs / Get it

```
sudo apt-get install ant java
wget https://dlcdn.apache.org/netbeans/netbeans/24/netbeans-24-source.zip .
```

2. Build / Install it

```
unzip ./netbeans-24-source.zip -d /tmp/netbeans
ant -Dcluster.config=basic build
mkdir ~/Tools
cp -r nbbuild/netbeans ~/Tools
```

3. Run it

```
cd ~/Tools/netbeans/bin
./netbeans
```

4. Launch it

```
sudo vi /usr/share/applications/netbeans.desktop
# Paste info:
[Desktop Entry]
Type=Application
Name=Netbeans
Comment=Java IDE
Icon=/home/user/Tools/netbeans/nb/netbeans.png
Exec=/home/user/Tools/netbeans/bin/netbeans
false=Terminal
Categories=Application;Development;
```

Where /home/user is the location of user’s home folder on the platform. Launcher will be under the “Programming” menu item.

by Shawn McKinney

2024 Year In Review

Hadn’t done one in a while, the last being back in 2020. Then as now feels significant. Each having somehow triggered a threshold, cumulative effect of many changes. It seems that all year-in-reviews are mixed. There will always be ups (getting into the Unbound 1000 mile club)

And downs (pulling the plug, mile 265 Long Voyage)

The good news, positive indicators are more plentiful than negative ones. We’re moving in the right direction.

Saline County, Kansas

I’m not an elite athlete. Just a regular Joe. Like to think pretty good at riding a bike. Done for health benefits. The adventure. Try to often and with friends whenever possible.

Not going into challenges. No fun to talk about, nor all that interesting, or even unique. We’ve all got them. No complaints for 2024.

It’s more fun to discuss the benefits of being outdoors. The many reasons why regular exercise is good for us and how cycling fits.

Dropping down into Alma, Kansas. Unbound 200

All as an excuse for the amount of time that I dedicate to it. Happy to argue that it’s better spent than in other ways. Can point to remote work as the enabler. When you take the time formerly spent commuting, and transfer to riding, it becomes easier to defend. Almost, but not quite a no-brainer.

Does it mean I’m not crazy? Let’s lay the facts bare. We’re talking about hundreds of hours.

Enough time to start a new business (been there, done that), or to pursue an advanced degree (not interested). Instead, I’m out there, as in literally.

No trainers. Everything outside this year. Did do a bunch of events. But, most of the miles was grinding over local routes. We can talk about not driving to ride. Meaning, start from home. That rule’s tough to follow when it comes to events. Who will ride TO the event? Hundreds of miles away. I know some people who do. Strong minded and well disciplined individuals. I’m not that committed. I can respect it though. It makes sense. Just not ready for it, yet.

Outside Kremmling, CO

Not always riding on a trail, although they are given precedence, much of it on the roads, paved or not. About the same number of miles as I used to put on a car.

Riding on the roads can bring dirty looks and words. We’ve been driven off. Targeted by enraged (or disengaged) motorists. It doesn’t happen often or even all that much. Very rarely. But, when you ride a lot, it happens. Call it an occupational hazard. Can’t be taken personally. It’s about us and them. Roadway designs. Defenses and solutions. There are better places than others. We’ll save that discussion for another day.

Given the drawbacks, can’t recommend this level of commitment for everyone. It works for me. Pretty sure that drivers aren’t all that happy, so it would work for some of them too. Less time spent in a car is better no matter how you look at it.

What I’m pretty sure about is to be back next year. Have some ideas on how to shake it up and extend into new territories.

We’ll see how it all plays out.

by Shawn McKinney

Top 10 Reasons Not To Do a Top 10 List (as a Lightning Talk)

Background:

Community Over Code (a.k.a. ApacheCon) has a tradition of closing its conference with a one hour session, held in the general assembly area, called “Lightning Talks”. Each speaker who participates is allotted at most 5 minutes to discuss anything they like. The only rule, other than 5 minutes, is that slides are NOT allowed.

It has long been a favorite of mine. The talks are usually silly, although they can be serious and sometimes quite moving.

For some reason, I allowed myself to be “talked into” getting on stage this evening.

My version:

10. Two words: No slides (Maybe could get away with cat memes).
9. We can’t wait to hear your amusing antidotes boiled into a Top 10 List (said no-one ever).
8. You might get away with it if they liked you, but they don’t. And, don’t you work on Apache Problematic, so even your tech stack sucks.
7. Not even halfway and You’ve Already Lost Them (They’re on their phones).
6. You could manage to generate interest (with a real topic). But, you’d just blow it trying to be funny.
5. Do you think this is Comedy Con? It’s a Technology Conference. 
4. It’s called Attention Span OK? Too many items to keep track of.
3. Top 10 Lists Should Be Funny. You’re No David Letterman.
2. Who put you up to this? Was it Chris? Hello! He’s Manipulating You! (He just wants to watch you squirm)
1. Because, ChatGPT can do it better?

ChatGPT’s version:

10. They’re Overused: Everyone makes top ten lists. Why not stand out by doing something different?
9. Restrictive: You might have 11 great ideas—or only 3. Forcing it into a top ten list is just… limiting.
8. Fake Drama: The suspense of counting down from 10 to 1 is overrated. We all know #1 is just as arbitrary as #7.
7. It’s Cliché: Top ten lists are the potato chips of content—they’re easy to consume but not always satisfying.
6. Ranking is Hard: Do you put the funny point at #4 or save it for #1? It’s an existential crisis waiting to happen.
5. Buzzfeed Has it Covered: They’ve already made every possible top ten list you can think of. Why compete?
4. Everyone Skips to the End: Admit it, most people scroll straight to #1 without reading the rest.
3. It’s Lazy: Why dig deep into a topic when you can just slap together a list? A deep dive can be more rewarding.
2. Unnecessary Pressure: Who needs the stress of coming up with exactly ten reasons? It’s a lot of pressure, honestly.
1. You’ll End Up Making One Anyway: By the time you reach reason #10, you’ve already written a top ten list—proving you couldn’t resist the temptation!

The second set was produced by ChatGPT. The first was authored by me. Which one was better? I’ll allow you to be the judge.

I asked the audience which one they preferred and lets just say it wasn’t me :/

by Shawn McKinney

2024 Long Voyage

Change was in the air. It was cool, but fixing to get a lot warmer. A new venue, Sandhills Event Center, just outside of Lincoln, Nebraska. A new vibe. The event had just changed hands. The route wandered further west than ever, into the Platte River basin. Don’t ask me what the Platte river looks like. I couldn’t tell you. It was dark. I’m getting ahead of myself.

Back to the route. It started on the NE side of Lincoln and worked its way around counter-clockwise in a loop. Actually, more like an inverted heart. Here’s a screenshot of the map:

Many different types of road surfaces. Mixtures of crushed rock, pea gravel, sand and dirt. Gradients between medium course and fine. Not much chunk and usually fast rolling. When laid deep, it gets dicey. Especially, when sharing with others (like cars). Imagine riding your bike through a layer of sand or gravel that is two or three inches deep. This gives you an idea. Not that it’s like that all the time – or even all that much.

On occasion, a road or a section of one gets sloppy. If you’re not paying attention, the wheel slides out. This can happen if you are going too fast or too slow, or if you don’t have the right line. You’ll be down in a heartbeat. My first year it happened twice, about 10 miles apart just 20 miles into the race. The first time I was rolling 30 mph and it scared me. The second time, 5 mph and it pissed me off. Had another 100 miles to go. It was frayed nerves and bandages with just a gentle tinge of heat exhaustion by the end. Sound like fun?

Actually, it was a blast. Learned a pretty good lesson too. Slow down. Fast is fun until it’s not. You’re not as good (of a rider) as you think. These so-called non-technical farm roads can be humbling.

The topography starts flat. It becomes hilly for a bit. Then, it turns flat again as we cross the Platte river basin. It ends with the classic Gravel Worlds rollers for perhaps the last 100 miles.

To say I was ready is an understatement. Not a stone left unturned. Training, nutrition, hydration, preparation were dialed in. As per custom, arrived a few days early to set up. Don’t like to be rushed. Rode the shakeouts. Hung out at the socials. Had a few nice meals with friends.

Like Carmen and John, of Lincoln. We met last summer, when they did the Buccaneer (32 miles). Up until that time, the furthest either had rode. All winter and spring they trained. Indoors and out. Working their way up to the Privateer (75 miles). Things were going great until Carmen got hurt on a training ride. She messed up her thumb badly enough for surgery and tendon reattachment. They’re tough. Just last week she got cleared to ride outside again and guess who’s back on the bike.

There’s also Michelle and Kelly, from Wichita. Michelle, rode the Privateer on Saturday. Kelly snagged a podium spot for competing in a double (25K run, 150 mile ride).

Don’t let these smiles fool you. Beasts one and all.

L to R, Venny, Michelle, Carmen, John and Kelly.

There’s always a bit of pressure on that starting line. Why I like to get there just a few minutes early. It helps to have friends around but you need quiet time to concentrate on the task at hand. All those months of preparation come down to this moment.

The first 200 miles, all good. We departed with what I’d classify as perfect riding weather for this time of year. Temps down in the 80’s. Winds fair and roads in great shape. You’d think with these conditions confidence would be soaring. Especially after all the hard work put into this year’s training effort. That was not the case.

Andy and I teamed up after the first five miles. I already knew he was a strong rider and reliable teammate because we rode together here last year. The entire second half along with two others – Greg and John. He on a single gear and mine had 12 (with electronic shifters).

We made good time. Mostly riding alongside in the beginning. Later, in the night, I’d get out ahead and he’d catch up every mile or so. Usually, there’d be some kind of wisecrack. On a 24+ hour bike ride stories will start to fall flat. Talking requires energy that can be preserved or used on practical things – like staying focused. Points will always be added for comedic effect. One liners a premium. But the laughs became increasingly rare as time passed and the temps crept up.

No surprises. We didn’t sign up for a cake walk. It’s called the Long Voyage. There aren’t any shortcuts. This is Nebraska. It’s supposed to be hard. (Find something to like about it)

Overnight was mostly uneventful as we traversed the Platte river basin. Initially, there’s the excitement of the experience. Andy began to struggle staying awake as we got into the morning hours. He had told me that when you fall asleep on a bike, you can still hear road noise. However, everything goes black. Obviously, not a good thing. I stopped drifting ahead and kept the conversation going.

There were towns to pass thru. A little eerie in the middle of the night rolling through without a soul in sight. Not even a car. Crickets. Where is everyone? They must have rolled up the sidewalks, or maybe the aliens got them? Speaking of, what are those creepy lights floating over the corn field? Oh, they use it to power their spaceships. What’s that – they drink it too?!

Like I said, a little weird. A sleep deprived mind gets to play tricks.

When the sun came up things were still good. At this point, we’re far enough ahead that a 7mph pace would finish. When I got the money shot.

The day played out like an old song on a worn out record. If you were born after 1985 think DVD. We knew the chorus but wanted to hear it again anyway.

As the temps climbed, so did the hills. We endured and made more jokes. Got into a discussion about starting an event and what to call it. Andy’s calling his “Free Ride” for two reasons. First, after the song by Lynyrd Skynyrd. Second, because he doesn’t want to charge anything for it. Well that’s all fine, but it’s NOT a Skynrd song! You must be thinking of “Free Bird.” You can’t use that name. I’m calling my gravel event in Arkansas “Free Bird.”

About when we crossed I-80 for the 5th time. I casually flipped the Interstate a Free Ride Bird. I don’t know why. Things were starting to get on my nerves. Back to the song. Maybe it’s Jethro Tull? No, they’re WAY too dark for that jazzy tune. I could hear it in my head …

Come on and take a free ride
Free ride
Come on and take it by my side
Come on and take a free ride!

— Edgar Winter “Free Ride”

The last bit of levity that could be mustered. It had turned into a war of attrition. My gut was playing a song of its own, and it sounded more like Jethro Tull.

So you ride yourselves over the fields and
You make all your animal deals and
Your wise men don’t know how it feels
To be thick as a brick

— Jethro Tull “Thick as a Brick”

These fine humans ran the Casey’s in Crete. It was the 2nd to the last stop (mile 252) on our Long Voyage. It was somewhere after 4pm and had been hot for many hours. I remained inside for a long time debating whether to call it quits. Others were there as well. It could not have been pleasant for them, messes that we were. We left behind pools of mud from the sweat dripping from our filthy bodies. No problem they told us with a smile. Their kindness made a huge impact.

Andy and Robin were cheerfully having ice cream like it was a “Saturday in the Park”. I dared not risk it. Downed a coke and had some pure water. It tasted good, but it wasn’t good for me. Poured a bottle of orange Gatorade into a Camelbak and diluted the rest with more water and ice. It was the strongest mixture I could handle. Previous stops I’d put two packages of LMNT into that 2L bladder. That’s 2000 mg sodium! Crucial for maintaining. Water without electrolytes means cramping and eventually hyponatremia.

Left Crete and crawled the next 10 miles to constant headwinds and more rollers. Andy had got out ahead and every now and then I’d reel him back in. Robin would stop, and I’d leap frog him. About then support vehicles pulled alongside and asked if I was ready to quit. I’m Good! I’d hear myself say it, but didn’t believe it, and could not squelch the negative thoughts about what lay ahead. I knew damn well what was there. Ended up pulling the plug mile 265. The decisive factor was of course the heat.

Be lying if I said it wasn’t disappointing. I’ll take a DNF over a lengthy recovery. Heat’s no joke, and I trained for exactly this. There are no guarantees. Ultras take us to our limit by definition. It’s possible to finish – or not. A shift in the winds, scattered shower, a few bites of a burrito, ounces of water or degrees of temperature can get you across the finish line or not. We deal with the outcome, gather takeaways and regroup for the next challenge. In this case there was nothing to be done. The hills won.

Epilogue

  1. Was careful when flipping the “Free Ride Bird” that no motorists saw it. The beef was between me and the Interstate (for whatever reason) and not the good people using it.
  2. Was happy that Robin and Andy each finished their 300 mile rides.
  3. I rode the 35 miles back to town with a support vehicle that included one paramedic and one bike mechanic. They were friendly, professional and compassionate. It turned out to be an ideal way to get pulled from the course. We drove to the finish line along the route. This provided me a back seat perspective on how they do their job as they helped other riders. It gave closure.
  4. Carmen and John were at the finish line (just like last year) waiting on me. The difference, last year I actually finished and this year didn’t. The kindness they showed was the same. They helped me unload from the van and walked me across the compound and we loaded my truck. I had to reassure them multiple times that I was OK, could drive back to hotel, etc.
  5. The event itself is in good hands going forward. I haven’t decided what capacity my return will be, but Lincoln will always be like a home to me.
by Shawn McKinney

Unbound ’24 Race Report

Arrived at the starting line 615a and took my place at the back of the pack. Snapped a few shots. Didn’t realize until later, caught Tim Hornik and his tandem partner. I saw them again Sunday morning on the podium in the men’s para category. Tim was wounded in action 20 years ago and lost all sight in one eye and most in the other. An avid cyclist, he’s been doing this event for many years. Surely this must be a good omen.

Also on hand was my brother Kelly who’s doing the 50 and cousin Gregg.

The Three Sanchos we called ourselves in ’16 (when this shot was taken) during our first attempt of the 200 mile course. This place tends to get in the blood.

As the national anthem played, LeAnne Rimes’ beautiful voice ringing, I contemplated gratitude. My wife, kids, brothers, sisters, parents, friends and employer all played a part. My LBS, Arkansas Cycling and Fitness. Training partners. The event organizers. They did an awesome job putting this on. The volunteers. A very long list. Some say getting to the starting line is harder than a finish. So many people helped get me to this one. I had to acknowledge that before letting go…

A few moments later we’re off. Cheering and cowbells. The air was crisp. The sun didn’t want to come out and play. I was OK with that.

A rider went down hard before we made it out of the block. Oof. Can’t unsee that and feel bad for them. Nothing can be done about it. It’s time to GO.

Not much different from the other 6 times. A ton of energy. Folks lining the street. We’re headed North this year. No train to block this exit.

The mood upbeat if not confident. A 3rd try for a fifth finish tends to make one wary. I’ve experienced the highs and lows of this event many times. An upbeat start is no harbinger of success. The cynical side wants to take over and has to be tamped down.

Despite these mixed feelings there was no dread which is a good sign. A decent nights sleep Friday for once. Training and prep were well executed. Legs feel good and promise in the air.

Caught up with fellow Arkansans Jed and David. Met Jed on the course back in ’17 and David not long afterwards.

We used to call ourselves the Arkansas Three. Back when we thought 5 finishes were in the bag. That was then and this is now.

Jed had some troubles and was derailed for a couple of years. David has been battling a serious heart condition. We’re crusty veterans of this race and hold no illusion. Finishes don’t come easy.

The going was good those first 40. We worked together and kept pace. I reconned the middle 75 (Eskridge to Alta Vista) earlier in the week and knew what we were fixing to get into.

Just outside of Eskridge (mile 40) is when the fun starts. Divide road.

Non-trivial. I crawled thru this section working my way around the other riders. Rocky, loose, rutted and punchy. Choose your line carefully. Sharp rocks jut up everywhere.

I got in front of David and Jed ahead of me. Keep the mind in the present. Don’t get in a hurry. We can make up time later. Have fun. Why we’re out here. Before we know it, we’re dropping down into a beautiful valley town called Alma (mile 71).

Gregg was waiting and quickly did the needful to get me going again. Caught up with David on my way out of town who was resting with his wife and daughters.

The next section (Alma to Volland) has nice rollers but its minimal maintenance roads (MMR) are tame in comparison to the previous section. It was here I bumped into Andy Phillips earlier in the week when doing recon. He was out on Bobby Thompson’s Flint Hills Ultra, a 1050 mile bikepacking time trial.

Nothing new for Andy. A veteran of all sorts of these kinds of events. Member of the Unbound 1000 mile club. Finisher of Cannonball and Long Voyage (3 times). Takes off from his home in Topeka on a single speed. Rides however many miles to the town hosting the event and then back home again.

When the sun started to peek out of the clouds David slowed and reminded me that I had to ride my ride. I wasn’t happy about leaving him behind but he was right.

As the air continued to warm, my legs started to cramp. I managed by altering cadence and getting in and out of the saddle. I learned the simple act of counting (in the head) with each breath staved them off. No idea why other than getting the mind to refocus.

Little Egypt road (mile 104) is where my troubles usually started (when on the North course). Had no difficulty on this day. The road itself was in much better shape than years past. Many riders had to walk these hills. I stayed in the saddle.

I knew in advance that if in decent shape by the second water oasis, Alta Vista (mile 112), my chances for a finish were good. In previous years (19, 21) only bad things happened here. Not on this ride. I stopped and the volunteers poured cold water over my head and legs. AHHHHH it felt SO GOOD!! If you’re reading this THANKS!! Y’ALL ARE AWESOME!!

Spirits were soaring as I rode out of town and really from that point on. Yes, it was still warm. Yes, I was riding solo. Yes, there are more miles, hills and chunky sections remaining. None of that seemed to matter. My pace continued to pick up and passed many more riders.

The plan was to meet Kelly and Gregg at CP2, Council Grove (mile 150) around 8p. There I would change into a fresh kit, sit and have a meal. Relax for a spell. Was looking forward to an iced Infinit Cold Brew. Maybe a cookie. But THAT was a Breakfast Club strategy and I was on a Midnight Club pace.

My phone got disconnected from the network and messages weren’t received meaning they didn’t get to the checkpoint in time. No matter. I had paid support (Crew For Hire). I arrived at 630p. A dropbag was waiting with the essentials.

A new plan was being drafted on the fly to get into the Midnight Club. The support crew refilled my bottles as I rebooted the phone and called my brother. They were 18 miles from the checkpoint and I asked them to turn around and meet me at the finish line.

The last 50 were a thing of beauty.

Crossed the line at 1045p.

This gets entry into both the Midnight and 1000 mile clubs. Was a wee wobbly once the adrenaline left. What now? Neil Taylor (Minister of Gravel) guided me out of the corral and made sure I received a medal, patch and glass. Items that go to every finisher. Thanks Neil!!!

When I found Gregg and Kelly and was sprayed with champagne (as if I’d won the race). Having eaten very little solid food, I was famished and a feast was waiting. Settled on smothered steak and gravy from IHOP. It maybe doesn’t sound good to you and never would’ve ordered it myself, but it was EXACTLY what was needed.

Also talked with Kelly Wenz who almost beat the sun. Waited around but missed Jed’s finish not long afterwards.

When I snapped a shot of Nick Gilroy who rode a Walmart single speed beach cruiser with his buddies. I saw them out around Little Egypt and couldn’t believe it. What in the …?

Cool dude. He had us cracking up. Why’d you do that? Something about losing a bet.

My brother then drove me back to the hotel where a hot shower and more food were waiting. Began to anxiously check the results for David and Bill Jeffery who was out doing the XL. I’d heard from a friend earlier that David made it to CP2 and was headed for Emporia. I texted and told him we’d be at the finish line. Was driving there when he texted back that he was pulled from the course. Still don’t know why but having breakfast with him and Jed this weekend and will get the story then.

Sunday was a day of celebration. Always one to attend the Unbound closing ceremony, this day Jed and I were up there as well.

by Shawn McKinney

Top 10 Reasons Cyclists ❤️ Motorists

  1. Useful when getting to events, support, hauling gear, etc.
  2. Not all bad. Especially when parked.
  3. Close passes (buzzing) keeps the mind sharp.
  4. No mini-marts without cars.
  5. The ones with bike carriers are nice.
  6. Loads of useful advice like when to stop, where to go, what to do with ourselves.
  7. Sometimes they’ll even honk to let us know how much they care.
  8. Deep down they love us too and would miss us if we were gone.
  9. Their taxes subsidize our roads.
  10. We all have to do it sometimes.

Obviously, it’s satire. In truth, most of us are motorists too. At least here in the states there’s literally no other way. I write this to find humor which counteracts hate.